When I was a kid, our local discount store, Venture (akin to K-Mart), had a section in the back of the store called "Hurt Toys". It was just a few shelves of slightly damaged toys, all marked at a discount. I would often go back there to look at what unfortunate toys had found their way to those shelves. While I could always walk away from broken trucks or board games that were missing pieces, anything with a face was hard for me to resist. Once I bought a stuffed rabbit with one ear.
The other day, after relating this story and talking about my affinity with strays, misfits, and all things broken and abandoned, my counselor asked me (sometimes, you just gotta pay someone to listen to you and ask the hard questions) "Are you a hurt toy?"
Yeah, I think I am. I don't know why I think that, but I always have. In some ways, I think we all are like hurt toys -- we all have those "broken" bits, some of which are perhaps visible to others, some we keep hidden. Maybe part of growing up is learning to love those broken bits in ourselves.
Don't even get me started on "The Velveteen Rabbit".
Yup...I are one, too. And I believe I've hit the sweet spot of loving those broken bits, after all these years.
ReplyDeleteNext comes...death?!
OK, several years of happiness, THEN death...a little better :)
What a lovely metaphor.
ReplyDeleteI think we are all hurt toys in some way or another - some more obviously than others.
I love your honesty. And I miss you!
Brandon -- if I remember correctly, you have some Eastern European heritage, no? I credit my "dark side" ("what's the point? we're all just going to die, anyway") to my Croatian grandfather.
ReplyDeleteVick -- thanks, thanks and ever thanks! I miss you, too!
Margie - yes, Bohemian, to be exact.
ReplyDeleteBut after having my mother here for 5 days back in mid-July, I can say I come by any negativity I might have (which is actually not much at all) honestly. In her old age, as she begins to slip and regress - early Alzheimers or dementia - to behvaving more like the child I suspect she was, I can say she's one of the most negative people that I know. Like, ever.
I just hope that's not me in 25 years...